8 days old

Wow. I can't believe it's been 8 days since Morgan made her grand entrance into our now crazy world. It's soooo rewarding but I'm not going to lie - it's challenging and sometimes we even cry together when it gets tough. Usually it's a result of me being SO overtired (I don't always feel this way) with a splash of hormones. Some highlights of the past week:

The Good:

• She's amazing. She's beautiful. I love her more than anything...
• She likes car rides...and if you talk to her Aunt Steph on the phone and turn off the radio to do so, she'll get upset until you turn the country back on. :) Atta girl.
• At night when she goes for 3 hours of sleep at a time, I feel like a new woman the next day...as long as there is another 2-3 hour stint in there as well.
  
• She's so little yet but getting big fast. Not sure how long we can pull off this "newborn" size...especially in diapers.
• Her toes are long like mine. Her face looks like her Daddy's baby picture. I love these things.

The Bad:

• Sometimes, like I said earlier, we cry together b/c life gets hard/challenging with a newborn.
  
• She's had one poo-splosion. It went through 2 onsies. Impressive.
• Today we went through 3 diapers before we got to the 4th clean one. Scenario - moderate poo diaper. Change diaper. Just as mommy's snapping the onsie in place, THAT toot happens...after she works that out, change diaper. Then she pees on the 3rd diaper b/c she's upset. 4th diaper is a charm. :)
• I'm finally starting to get "tough" during breastfeeding. This is/has been BRUTAL. As in ranked #2 behind contractions/labor. It IS getting better though as we get used to each other and I position her better. Praise the LORD or I'd be buying new tatas.
  

The Beautiful:

• Even when it's the middle of the night, just as she's (finally) falling back to sleep, she'll sometimes accidentally smile. And melts my heart even though I'm frustrated or upset that I'm awake at that hour.
• I love the way Adam loves her. He's so natural at the "Daddy thing" with Morgan.
  

But more later, as duty calls. Adam worked all day today and is now at class taking a test...makes for a semi-tough day. We're getting through it and just about to get her another sponge bath I think...makes for an unhappy baby. Wish me luck!

The Picture Post

Finally!! Some pictures!! Please enjoy them and thank you for your patience with me posting them so late. Beware - she's really cute and easy to fall in love with...or maybe we're biased. :)

A tuckered out Morgan & Daddy...being born is hard work!

A happy, clean mommy and Morgan.

A very PROUD Daddy and Morgan just before leaving the hospital.

So sleepy and hot from some screaming...

Morgan in her "little lamb" swing - sometimes it's good, sometimes it's not.

Daddy & Morgan relaxin', watchin' football.

First "bath" - NOT a happy camper

Morgan after she was "hit" by the Mack truck of fatigue and oversized jammies.

Morgan enjoying her baby book from her friend, Campbell Keibler.

Morgan Addison Schmidt, Installment #4

Wow! Two in one day! That means I'm minding what the doctors told me to and am getting 2 sitz baths in today. Go me. :)

So the epidural was in and while I could still move my legs a bit, they were relatively numb and the moving was not very reliable. I could still feel the top of the contractions like I said in my PP, but eventually even those went away for the most part. I took the opportunity to relax and doze a bit (can you believe one could DOZE during labor?? It IS possible, ladies and gentlemen, with the help of the epi). Eventually Dr. Coleman came back to check me again and said I was at a 6 (cm). I was shocked and surprised since she'd only been gone an hour or two! Then the nurse checked me later and I was at an 8!! Another hour or so had gone by. Things were speeding up now and we were getting pretty excited...although my excited was more of a big sheepish grin since it didn't hurt at all anymore, really.

Then the nurse said that she wanted to put in a catheter since it had been a while since I'd used the bathroom (epi = no walking, so no peeing) and announced she'd do so around 6:15pm after checking me to see my progress. She was thinking it might be a quick in/out thing and not be left in b/c I was making such good/fast progress. Well, 6:15pm rolls around and she doesn't come back. I digress for a minute - while I could feel no real pain per se, I could definitely feel pressure of Morgan moving down. It wasn't a painful pressure at all, just something where I knew she was moving through my body. Hard to explain...but that's the best I can do. Finally I told Adam that if Carol (nurse) wasn't back by 6:25pm, I was going to call for her b/c every time I was contracting, I felt like she was getting lower in my pelvis. So 6:25pm rolls around and I call her in.

Carol checks and says yup, you're at an 8/9cm and since Dr. Coleman will come when you're at 9cm, we'll do the cath and then check to see if it's time to call her. So eons later (at least this is what it feels like when you're just about to meet your daughter after anialating your body) she checks me one more time and says "Yup, you're at a 9, I'm going to go call Dr. Coleman and then we'll cath you. It should take her 10 minutes to get here." By the time she got the tools back for cathing, Dr. Coleman was there and making jokes and laughing with us. I was cathed (they took it right out, woo hoo!) and Dr. Coleman said we didn't need to keep it in since Morgan would be here soon. She checked me and said "You're at a 10! We can start having you push now." Ok, I did my best not to cuss up to this point and I must reiterate that I'm not in pain, but I looked at Dr. Coleman and said, "You've got to be shitting me" before a big smile spread across my face. (Again, who would be smiling when her parts about to be potentially ripped apart?!? - yeah, me).

So the next contraction came and I started pushing. Now, I have no idea how this actually works as I'm a rookie. Do I push like I'm going #2? Do I concentrate on my stomach muscles? Either way, Adam grabbed a leg, a nurse grabbed a leg, and I grabbed behind my knees and bore down. I got about 3-4 pushes in per contraction each lasting about 10 seconds. Everyone around me did great telling me when to breath and when I was doing better vs not as productive pushing.

Let me preface this next part. Adam has told me from the very beginning that he did not want to "look" while the baby was coming out. That was fine with me, whatever made him more comfortable and better able to support me was great. So when Morgan's head was visible and Dr. Coleman announced she had lots of dark hair, I just about died laughing when she said, "Adam get over here, you have to see this." I'm pushing, mind you, but in my head I'm laughing hysterically to see what he's going to do. So he goes to look...and said it was amazing to see what was going on. He also failed to mention until after (because he's really a genius - seriously) that his first thought was "Holy crap, she's huge" as that would have not been good to hear on my end.

So push push push for almost a half an hour and Dr. Coleman announces she is going to do an episiotomy. NO!! I don't WANT her to cut me and make the baby come out easier! She said a cut heals better/faster than a tear; I said give me one more try/contraction/pushing series and I could do it; she said ok, but after that she was going to cut a little. Fine. I instantly became the best pusher EVER and made enough progress where she didn't have to cut...and at 7:29pm, out came her head, then shoulder #1, and just as quickly, shoulder #2...and voila!! Morgan Addision Schmidt was here!!!!! Adam's reaction - amazement and not many words...my reaction - pointing at the baby saying "Ah!! Ah!! She's here!! Oh my God!! She's here!! Look at her, she's right there!!!" in a tone that went something like this - I'm the winner!! I just won everything! I did it!! It was amazing. And next thing I know I have this little being on my chest screaming her head off (best sound ever that day). I suddenly came to my senses and said "wait!! She's a girl, right??" b/c the umbilical cord was between her legs, and yes (obviously) she had her girl parts that we had checked and double checked multiple times on ultrasounds.

Birth was truly amazing. I'd do it all over again as long as I was garaunteed an epidural. :) More later...water out again in my sitz bath.

Morgan Addison Schmidt, Installment #3

Alright, where was I...so Dr. Coleman broke my water around 4pm. Thank goodness my friend, Abbie, had warned me that the pain would likely go up pretty quickly from there or I would NOT have been prepared for the onslaught of pain that came on within about 10-15 minutes. I was all set to keep breathing and see what I could do - my doctor, the genius (seriously speaking here) stuck around to see how I would do...needless to say, it was not going well. Meaning my pain tolerance. I consider myself a pretty tough gal when it comes to that stuff. I've played through all sorts of pains and even did 50% sprints on a torn ACL in high school track. I've handled quite a bit without a tear. All these things combined are NOTHING compared to labor, as I'm sure many of you women can attest to. I instantly forgot any breathing techniques I had learned and just knew that I might die here on this bed if I have to go through this until the middle of the night sometime (which was a good possibility, per doc/nurse) with contractions coming every 2 minutes (meaning a peak every 2 minutes) and being super intense. I promised myself I wouldn't shed a real tear b/c I knew then that I would lose it and never make it back to any sort of control I might have had. That said, I cried without tears at each contraction, clung to the bed rail for fear of breaking any of Adam's appendages from monster squeezes, and just prayed for each one to be over. I feel badly for anyone who came down the hall at that point on her way to labor b/c I was unable to be quiet and was rather loud. I only cussed a few times, though, so I have to be a little proud of that. :)

So anyway, backing up a little...by the 2nd contraction after Dr. Coleman broke my water, I yelled "yes!!! I want the epidural!! Get him!!" and Dr. Coleman vanished into thin air to order it. Of course the epi guy isn't waiting outside the door or anything so after what felt like 10 years (Adam claims 20 minutes. Not so sure about that.) this guy finally walks through the door. I didn't cuss at him, but I did say, "OH THANK GOD YOU'RE FINALLY HERE!!" I may have said something else like what took so long, but we'll claim that as a long lost memory that may not have actually been said. ;) So Carol (one of the best nurses) had me hang on to the sides of her scrubs (which I thought was instant permission to cling for dear life - Adam ended up helping the anesthesiologist with instruments) and tuck my chin while sitting (another time I thought they were lying - they wanted me to MOVE??? I had been lying on my side) so he could get the epi in asap.

Here's the fun part...I'm sitting there, doing what I'm pretty sure is the next closest thing to dying, and all of a sudden I hear, "Don't you go to the University of Iowa?" and Adam respond with, "Yeah, I take MBA classes right now..." and they start discussing how they've actually had a CLASS together, etc etc...and thank God I could hardly talk b/c the thoughts running through my head at that point went something like this; "I don't care WHERE you go to school or WHAT class you guys took together (points at self/back) - GET YOUR MIND IN THE GAME AND GET THAT DAMN NEEDLE IN MY SPINE!!!!" But I held back (mostly b/c I couldn't talk) and just waited for that wonderful chemical concoction to kick in and make me feel less like I was dying. And when it did, it was the best thing ever. First my right leg/foot started to get hot, then slowly my left did...then I was only feeling the very top of the contractions...then I was hardly feeling them at all. I didn't care who checked me, who did what, looked where; I could breath again. I wasn't dying. And it all went great after that.

Again. Water gone. More later. I hear a fussy baby that just had a minor blowout (not an outfit change! Yeah!) who is likely hungry. :)

Morgan Addison Schmidt, Installment #2

So after I wrote about the first half of the birthing story yesterday, I realized I forgot a crucial part. At the noon-ish visit from Dr. Coleman, she was checking me (which was getting a bit painful due to the amount of time it was taking her) when all of a sudden I was in an extreme amount of pain while she was in there. I kind of yelped out loud a bit and she nodded and said something along the lines that she understood and was sorry. When she was done checking me, I asked her why that had hurt so much more...she said she had stripped my membranes. Now don't get me wrong, I think I've sung Dr. Coleman's praises a million times on this blog and will continue to do so as I really like and trust her. HOWEVER, that doesn't mean she's absolutely perfect b/c the fact that she was stripping my membranes would have been an EXCELLENT thing to know ahead of time so I hadn't almost jumped off the table in pain. It was over quickly...but next time...a little WARNING please!!

So anyway, we were at the 3/4pm visit from Dr. Coleman. This is where it gets interesting. At this point, she comes in to check me and had said that if I was at a 3/4cm, then she would break my water and it would be go-time today (Monday). Back up. My contractions at this point were requiring breathing through them, just big in/out breaths, but breathing to manage the pain nonetheless. So she goes in to check and is digging around forever again...and then announces that she's breaking my water (this is all in fastforward motion, btw), has Adam help her get the "magic wand" out, and POW there goes the flood. And I mean flood! I was pretty sure that all liquid that was currently in my body was now all over the bed. It didn't hurt to have my water actually broken but as one could imagine, it was pretty gross feeling. I never saw it. Then Dr. Coleman delivered some not-so-good news - the water had a *slight* tinge of green to it and I immediately knew what she was going to say...yup, there was a little meconium (baby poo) in the water but it was a very SLIGHT tinge so likely it would all be ok. She was just going to have to take an extra second or two when Morgan's head was out to suction and get any remaining meconium out of her mouth/nose before birthing the rest of her.

Shoot - I ran out of water in my sitz bath. This is where it gets really interesting b/c the pain went from a 4/5 to about a 90 in less than 10 minutes. Again, more on that next time, folks. Thanks for being patient with me. I realize I haven't put pictures up yet, but I can't take my PC to the bathroom with me - only a laptop will do. :) Until next time...

Morgan Addison Schmidt

She's here!! She's here!! And she's perfect!! I plan to write the birth story in stages just because a mommy has to be flexible and I'm doing alright at it, I think. Adam's been amazing and I just have to start off with that. I wouldn't have been able to do this without him.

So we went in Sunday night and got settled in. The nurse put in the prostoglandins, which, as I think I mentioned before, is like a little flat tampon of chemicals that stays next to my cervix over night for 12 hours. After registration and everything finally got done, my cool nurse handed me over to the ok nurse who put it in - ow. She had a hard time finding my cervix which of course meant more "in time" which never feels comfortable when the nurse is near your tonsils. :) But success, it was in, and we went to sleep with thoughts of our daughter running through our heads.

We were awakened the next morning at 6am and I was allowed to take the prostoglandin tampon out. Half an hour later, they started me on Pitocin. I was pretty sure that since I was already 2cm and 80% effaced before the Prostoglandins that I would be almost ready to get into labor after that...but alas, I had not made much further progress. Boo. Was kind of sad about that. So off to Pitocin we went.

We ate breakfast (which was liquids only for me - ick), watched some TV, and waited for Dr. Coleman to come and check my progress. I was fully expecting to hear that I had made moves in cm's but alas, she came in, and nothing. I hadn't really moved at all by 9am. I was pretty disheartened by this news as I had anticipated having a baby around the noon hour, maybe late afternoon. Dr. Coleman told the nurse, Carol (loved this one), to up the Pitocin a bunch and keep her posted. She'd be back around noon. Which really meant almost 1pm in doctor time. :) She checked me and said that I had made "progress" but was really only at a 2, maybe 3. BUMMER! I was sad again and she told us our options -

1. Keep going with the Pitocin and if I get to a 3-4 (cm) then she'd break my water and we'd go for it.
2. If I hadn't made progress then we could stop the Pitocin and wait until the morning when I was given mondo-Pitocin and they'd break my water - a sure bet we'd have the baby the next day.

I was devastated to hear #2. In my mind, her birthday was MONDAY, OCT.19th. Not the 20th - that wrecked my whole "granddaughter sandwich" idea for birthdays (Al's is the 18th and my dad's is the 20th). So Dr. Coleman said that she'd come back around 3-4pm and we'd make a decision from there.

I'm writing these posts where all mommies get privacy - in the bathroom in a sitz bath (helps for healing). My water for the bath just ran out so I'll continue this tomorrow. And maybe post some pictures...I've got some on facebook, but I know not all of you can get there. I'm working on it! :) And loving being a new mommy.

We're goin' in..

WOAH. I think we're officially ready to go in (as I have a big BHC on my own). I know I said the game plan, but here it is one more time:

• Go to hospital by 6pm tonight. Get the chemical insertion (prostoglandins). Wait 12 hours and see what happens. This chemical may be enough to put me into labor but there's no way to tell.
• Monday morning - 6am. Start Pitocin, the magical "put me into labor" drug. For many women, it causes a fast, more painful labor. For others, it causes a long, drawn out labor. It really depends on many different factors and if your cervix is ready/lowered/thinned out/etc. Since I have quite a bit of my effacing done and some dilation, I'm guessing (and hoping a little) that I will be in the former group of fast, painful labor.
• Plan of attack - go without drugs for as long as I can. If that means no drugs at all, great. If that means I make it 10 minutes and am screaming for the epidural, that's fine with us too. It's a game-day decision, much like the baby's middle name. :)
  

Ok, off to eat my last hot meal until I'm 45. Thank you in advance for your love, support, and prayers! We'll keep you posted as soon as we can as we welcome our little bundle of joy into the world. Wish us luck! :)